disillusion and wonder

i have recently experienced a strange theme of becoming disillusioned with people around me. some of the things i have seen and felt people do have simply dismayed me, and i don't always know what to do with it. whether i am discouraged by some of the choices i have seen my friends make, or simply people letting me down, i could feel myself sinking into an emo-like mood of being annoyed at the world, something i had never felt before.

i have an assignment due for my education curriculum class in which i must look at various types of curriculum and evaluate them based on worldview, quality, etc. i wasn't particularly looking forward to this assignment, but i knew i needed to do a high quality job in order to get a decent grade.
i looked through the first two curriculum plans without very much interest, but when i got to the third( a secular text), i found myself completely absorbed into the material. i started to get the excitement that would normally come when you run down the stairs on christmas, or you are sitting in a movie theater waiting to see your favorite movie's sequel. at least, these are things which give me this excited feeling.

there i was, sitting in dordt's learning resource center, reading a high school biology textbook, and i felt my calling as a science teacher so completely that i stopped reading for a moment and smiled. while i have definitely felt that i was called to be a science teacher, i think that before now the idea was more of a sum of my love of science and my ability to communicate ideas to others.
the new excitement came from simply reading through this textbook for a project, and yet as i looked through this very well written book, i suddenly felt overwhelmed with anticipation for the day that i could help my students explore ideas like how the brain works and what our world would be like without science. i could imagine myself teaching my class the material in the book, and i finally felt the same jubilee that i've heard in other education majors so many times.

and so my disillusion with some of the people around me faded away for once, and i could focus on more that just the way my social life was going. i now have a more defined goal in my life, and like the end of a 100-meter dash(notice all the metaphors and similes...), i can't wait to get there.